Saturday, July 31, 2004

Lewis Black On NPR


Link
I love this guys energetic rage. I swear he's gonna pop and drop right on stage. I can't believe I missed him when him and Dave Attel came to St. Louis

I was driving around and this was on a few days ago, but I missed it. I still haven't listened to it yet, but I post it so you can. You need RealPlayer for this one.

Friday, July 30, 2004

Census bureau sharing information on Arab Americans


WASHINGTON -- The Census Bureau has provided specially tabulated population statistics on Arab Americans to the Department of Homeland Security, including detailed information on how many people of Arab backgrounds live in certain ZIP codes.

The assistance is legal, but civil liberties groups and Arab American organizations say it is a dangerous breach of public trust and liken it to the Census Bureau's compilation of similar information about Japanese Americans during World War II. SeattlePi.com


This is why you should always answer every survey with the intention to fuck up the system.

via Fark

Sullen, Depressed President Retreats Into Private,
Paranoid World



A sullen President George W. Bush is withdrawing more and more from aides and senior staff, retreating into a private, paranoid world where only the ardent loyalists are welcome
article via Capitol Hill Blue


Bush Using Drugs to Control Depression, Erratic Behavior

President George W. Bush is taking powerful anti-depressant drugs to control his erratic behavior, depression and paranoia, Capitol Hill Blue has learned.

The prescription drugs, administered by Col. Richard J. Tubb, the White House physician, can impair the President’s mental faculties and decrease both his physical capabilities and his ability to respond to a crisis, administration aides admit privately.

article via Capitol Hill Blue


Only Bill Hicks could get the laugh I have going in my internal monologue right now.

I get upset when some on-line stranger disses me, I can't imagine what it's like to have entire countries of people hating you.

Serves you right motherfucker. When the voices in your head are telling you that you gotta kill to serve the Higher Purpose, that means you're craaaaaazy.

via and by way of-American Samizdat

Also
Bush on the Couch, Inside the Mind of the President, by Justin A Frank

Cuookoo clocks are too funny, think squirmy nest of snakes.



Bong Water Non-Alcoholic Beer Beverage?

And it's sold in St. Louis. Cool concept, crappy website.

Sleep position gives personality clue


Random URL search netted me this link via BBC News

I'm glad that Science is hard at work on determining my personality based on my sleep position. Now together with Phrenology and a handwriting sample you can get a complete anaylsis of Cap'n Mark in just under an hour.

Too bad my sleep position is a mutant-hybrid form not on this list due to sinus positioning. But then again, just the use of the words mutant-hybrid pretty much sums it all up

Thursday, July 29, 2004

Becoming Abe Simpson


Missouri has a constitutional amendment coming up in August 3rd Election defining marriage as being between a man and a woman. I am insensed about this and let a congressional candidate know that. Weirdpixie suggested I send to the local paper as a letter, so I cleaned it up, changed my focus a little and sent it in yesterday. I had to cut out the "Gays are the New Niggers" because I don't want to be dismissed immediately as a crank. Let 'em get a picture of me to figure that out.

Letter hasn't been printed yet. Maybe I'll send it in tomorrow if it hasn't yet.


Dear Editor,

I believe that Amendment 2 should not pass. As I read the letters published in your paper, I see that many argue that Gay Marriage will destroy the institution of marriage. I have read that America itself will fall because our very foundation of "Traditional Marriage" is crumbling. I have seen concern in regards to telling children about why that child has two Dads, and I must respond that such concerns about the loss of values, moral decay and the corruption of children is rationalistic fantasy.

Passage of Amendment 2 is discrimination plain and simple because it is treating one group of people less well than others on the grounds of their sexual orientation.

Sexual Orientation is NOT a choice one can make. It is a physical trait as real as skin and eye color, and any negative action you take against a class of people with the trait "Homosexuality" is an action of discrimination.

Now Homosexuals are not asking for special treatment, they are asking for the same rights as everyone else. Where would America be today if everyone were not granted equal treatment?

Women, where would you be today if you were not granted the equal right to vote and to work and earn the same amount as the men?

People of color, where would you be if you were still not allowed to eat with the whites or granted the right to equal education, and equal job opportunities?

On the issues of moral decay and family values your arguments ring hollow. Just admit it, it is your fear of homosexuality that drives this amendment. It is your lack of tolerance that is breaking up the Nuclear Family, and wrecking homes. Your nonaccpetance of homosexuality is keeping millions of your own family members in the closet, keeping your own blood in tormented fear of being found out. You, who vote for this amendment, are a cause of the disintegration of the American Family.

The bottom line is this: if you vote for this amendment, YOU, the voter, are personally responsible for making another human being less than you are. By playing word games with definitions YOU are actively taking away rights from another person, YOU have turned human beings into second class citizens, and it is YOUR example of intolerance and fear that negatively influences the future generations far more than the allowance of equal rights of a group of people.

By turning a blind eye, by voting for the Amendment 2, YOU are continuing the legacy of discrimination. YOU are a dragging weight on the future where equality is granted for everyone regardless of race, religion and sexual orientation.

By voting for Amendment 2, YOU bog us down in 19th century politics, divert precious mental and physical resources away from a national will to complete Great Achievements such as the conquering of AIDS and the uplifting of our fellow Brothers and Sisters worldwide, and yes, hopefully, one day the settling of our respective differences and the abolition of War.

Vote NO on Amendment 2

Baby Cake Secrets Revealed


Cake Pan

Fondant Icing
We purchased our premade Fondant at Michaels Craft Store

Locutous of Borg




I have a Ph sensor jammed up my nose and hooked to a mini-comp in order to get to the bottom of this Acid Reflux thing. I'm still having some difficulty swallowing and get the occasional burn, even though I've switched to a primarily Ayurvedic diet.

The first part, the motility test was a drag because a tube the size of soda-straw went up my nose, down to my throat to test my swallowing abilitites. I was supposed to hold my swallows for 25 seconds, then sip some water, but I kept swallowing before the sip and screwing up the measurments and waiting again. The very unfriendly nurse had no patience with this and I had to settle for a half-assed dry swallow measurment. Essentially she didn't help me help myself, so I'm pretty pissed about that.

This sensor is much thinner, and nearly invisible. I've been told I can eat whatever I want today to trigger acid reflux to be measured, so it's pizza and hamburger today. Perhaps...hopefully, I can eat a dill pickle! But unfortunatley, no coffee. It's going to throw off my diet of days, but it should be kinda fun.

Mushroom the size of Deleware






I was doing a training ride on Tuesday when I saw I gigantic cluster of mushrooms. My friend Dave, a mushroom hunter, came over later on and we collected this huge specimen (see Prof. Farnsworth for size referece...take THAT Oregon spore).

Dave correctly identified this mushroom as Armillaria tabescens , and Alessandra double checked it on line and discovered:

Though it is frequently listed as a good edible, I do not recommend it, since it is known to cause stomach upsets in some people, even when thoroughly cooked. In my area (east-central Illinois), it usually has a bitter and unappetizing taste, anyway.


Ale and I decided not to eat them, so we gave them to Dave who swings by NTM from time to time. So how were they Dave...did they taste like burning?

Tuesday, July 27, 2004

Letter to a Pro-Life "Maverick" Democrat Running for Congress



I just sent this off as an email. I thought you might get a kick out of it.

Hello Mr. Favazza,

My name is Mark Plattner and I live in the Clifton Heights Neighborhood. I just got a flier on my door today and as I read it I decided that I have a few comments for you.

Bans on Gay Marriage and Civil Unions are legalized discrimination. Once upon a time Blacks were not allowed to marry Whites because it would have ruined the institution of marriage.

Gay marriage and civil unions will not wreck the American Family. Getting married too quickly, not trying to reconcile differences and quick fix culture lead to divorce which leads to broken families and bad feelings cause more damage than having a married gay couple live next door. In the United States, all people of all races, all religions and all sexual orientations should be allowed to marry, and if you support this ban, no matter how you rationalize it, you may as well be calling Gays, "niggers".

On the issue of Abortion.
I see you have 8 children. I have none, I don't want any. If I accidentally impregnate my wife will you take this child off my hands and raise it as your own because she can't have an abortion? There is an old saying: "If you save a live, you are responsible for taking care of it." Are you ready to do that for all of your constituents?

I think the world already has too many unwanted children. Forcing people to have them against their will, will do more to damage the child growing up, as well…having a gay couple live next door.

On the issue of St. Louis Residency Rule:
This is an interesting one. The voters said that St. Louis Police Officers have to live in St. Louis. Well, why is the will of the people to decide where their police officers live? Shouldn't the officers themselves determine their own lives? Your opponent Barry attempted to overturn this allowing the officers to live outside of the city, and in the process earned her the Police Officers' Association's endorsement, yet you say this is a bad thing. I say that a Happy Cop is a More Vigilant Cop.

The Police Officers Association bothers me all the time for money, I would hazard a guess that they know more about the well being of City Police more so than the locals who are forcing them to live within the city.

In conclusion, when it comes time to vote I will indeed "Make August 3rd Independence Day" by emancipating myself from your wrong-headed, surprisingly right-wing, "Democratic Maverick" bigotry and vote for someone other than you.

Sincerely,

Mark Plattner

Grand Theft Security Revisited


In case you missed it the first time.

Our Freedoms ARE being trampled as I write this.

I suspect that iffenWhen the Regime is Changed, that not too much will differ.

via-American Samizdat

Monday, July 26, 2004

Hip-Hop Stars Aim to Get Fans to the Polls


Ummm...Rock on!

-via Yahoo

BabyCakes Part II



I'm so proud of Alessandra for her Baby Cake. What you are looking at is a vanillia cake with a chocolate fudge ice cream dome in the middle, surrounded by blue sugar paste icing. Sooo smooth it looks. It's gonna taste great!

This is much more appetizing than the Fetus Cake posted a few days before.

In case you weren't aware...

Walmart really is evil.

via FARK and a billboard near my house with Alessandra telling me about it.

Large Monkey



Haven't you learned your lesson by now?

thanks to Rev. John Fenderson

MS150 News


As the pledges begin to trickle in, some people are apologetic about the amount that they can donate. I say "Pee-Shaw!" to that. Regardless of what the news says, the economy still sucks. I'll gladly take whatever pledge at whatever level you want. $1.00, $2.50, $5.00, well wishes and good vibrations...it's all good,and adds up in the end.

Do not let your guilt override what you can actually give!

Contributors of every kind will each receive a Cap'n Marrrrk certificate of recognition up to the point where I start to lose money on postage.

Sunday, July 25, 2004

Note to Blue Collar Workers:
Fast Food Restaurants Want You to Die!


I agressively watch tv. Not content to suckle off The Tube's electric titty until my brain goes dead, I watch tv as an intellectual exercise with the premise: "How stupid do they really think we are?" We all know the answer to that one but I'll say it anyway:Pretty Fucking Stupid, but I digress, much better than I have spoken at length about television.

But I did notice something odd last night...

In St. Louis we have Hardees, which is really owned by Carl's Jr, and Rally's which is secretly a Checkers.

So it began several years ago when Hardees began targeting the blue collar worker in their ads. I noticed that as they introduced their 1/3 Thickburger or their Six Dollar Burger that most of the characters in their "testimonial" style commericals were portrayed as blue collar type guys. They all wore workshirts, spoke in that "plain talkin-no-nonsense" that are stereotypical blue collar speech patterns. Anyone call tell who their target demographic is. Fine, fine whatever. It bugs me, but then again, a lot of stuff does.

So last night I'm half watching tv and I see a commerical for Rally's which is also targeting the blue collar demographic. Perhaps it was just the imagery of a street crew ogling the hot chick's burger as opposed to said hot chick.

I've known for years that Corporations are amoral and could give a rats ass about it's own consumer base, but the more I began to think about it, it would seem to me that based on how unhealthy their products are, that to woo a consumer base to eat these things, is actually an aggressive campaign against said target group. Ironcially enough, the products listed at the above link are the "Low Carb" items. Check out the Breakfast Bowl and how much of the calories are from fat.

Blue Collar Workers of America: Thank you for building our houses, paving our street, assembling the infrastructure of our world AND cleaning it up.

First Dodge calls you Dodge owners pussies, then Fast Food wants you to get fat and die.

What are you going to do about it?

Sponsor Me on my Psychotic Psychle for MS


About a month ago, right in the midst of some serious lifestyle changes and and the resulting Brutal Sinus Infection that I'm STILL recovering from, I stupidly agreed to take part in the MS-150 Bike Ride September 11 & 12,

This is a two day event where my team, The Psychlers (Captained by my friend Jeremy Reynolds), will ride 75 miles a day to raise money for MS (Multiple Sclerosis for those of you not in the loop).

I thought it would be a good way to get some much needed exercise and perhaps help my body corpus cleans itself of some toxins, but I haven't been on my bike since March or Early April when the air was so cold that it my throat would close up (even with protection) and the doctor had to give me an inhaler. I was lucky if I could even do a mile back then.

So about 2 weeks ago I decided to start training. I rode a couple of miles, then I rode 10. Feeling embiggened I went on an official training ride with my team (The Psychlers) for a 30 mile hill-fest. I ended up walking a few miles, but I survived.

Oh yeah, everyone else has road-bikes and I have a hybrid mountain bike so I have to work twice as hard.

I began riding my bike 4 miles to work nearly every day, and taking the long way home (about 10 miles or so) and last weekend I rode 34 miles on a nice mostly flat Illinois country road. I didn't die.

Blah, blah, got "slicks" for my tires to ease the friction of the bike against the road, and my rides became much easier. Not to mention I'm finally getting in shape.

This week I put a few 16 mile days in and yesterday and today went between 20 & 22. Tomorrow I have a 27 rolling hill training ride, but I feel confident I should have no problems with it.

Soon, I shall be riding no less than 20 miles each ride, and hope that by Mid-August, I've boosted up to 50 as a near regular thing as I'm running out time.

So the reason why I'm calling is that, yes I need money. By signing on the line, I am committed to raising $200 clams minimum, but of course Guido and Rocco have called to tell me that they would like more.

You don't have to send any money now, but pledging me for a flat rate or per-mile rate would be d-d-d-dandy.

Friday, July 23, 2004

Win a Free Copy of The Long Road


For some reason this band's songs play in my head when I ride my bike. I wonder if the weird brain chem that occurs when I ride somehow activate sleeping parts of my memory.

Name the song and the band


Moses went up to the mountain, high
To find out from God, "Why did you make us, why?"

Secret words in a secret room:

I say, "A Whomp bob a loo bop a whomp bam boom!"

"I did not put you here to suffer.

I did not put here to whine.

I put you here to love one another,

And to get out and have a good time,

Now, Now, Now."



If you value people over big business...



then visit Disinfopedia and free your mind.

Baby Cakes


I love my sister Tracy in spite of the fact she is a Stepford Wife. To my knowledge, she has no interior monologue, no interests other than keeping fit, eating well and raising the baby. Talking to her is like talking to an alien: I simply cannot understand where she is coming from.

However, despite my initital misgivings when I heard she was pregnant, she became a great, loving mother and a caring fantastic sister.

She's pregnant again, this time with a boy, and it will be her last because A, she has a matched set, and B her husband got the boy he wanted.

That all said, the baby shower is Tuesday and Alessandra wanted to make special cake for the event. She's really good at the custom cake thing, and we have a variety of cake molds and pans to really do pretty much anything.

She found this grotiferious thing this while searching for Baby Themed Cakes.
I think she should do it, but even I would have a problem eating the thing.

screamMachine The Art of Gearoid Dolan

Wednesday, July 21, 2004

Speaking of Neuro-Semantics...



The Institute of Neuro-Semantics

go to NS Writings

there will be a quiz.

Bush-Hitler: Hypnotizing the Masses


I am not saying Bush=Hitler. However, a comparison can be drawn to the way they communicate their messages to the people. As much as I like to think I celebrate individuality, I know that nearly anyone in a group can be drawn into a "Mass". It's tough to resist, especially when you are in a place where a speaker is using lingustic tricks on you. I've been there and been converted (although to a relatively benign cause that helped me turn my life around at a time when I needed it), but it wore off and I am wary about allowing myself in such a similar situation.

Language is power, it is the ocean in which we swim, it is structure that shapes our world view, and a master of it can essentially craft your world view for you, and you won't even know it. It's like acid: dosage, set and setting. Bam! You are enchanted...it's that easy.

A lot of people could argue with this and say "I can't be hypnotized, I've tried, it doesn't work." and they say this while wearing their Gap clothing and drinking their Budweiser.

Agree with it or not. It is an interesting read.


Said by some to be more dangerous than Osama bin-Laden, he has been condemned as a "war maniac," called a "moron" by the Canadian prime minister’s chief spokeswoman, ridiculed as "The English Patient" for his struggles with language, and likened to Adolf Hitler. 

Of all the labels hung on George W. Bush, the hardest to shake may be the comparison with Hitler.

Perhaps the clearest likeness between the two men lies in their use of emotionally induced hypnosis to plant in the mass consciousness an image of themselves as protectors of their subjects from threats to national survival both inside and outside the fatherland. 

In a June, 2003 article written for The Nation about Bush’s "mastery of emotional language, especially negatively charged emotional language," clinical psychologist Reanna Brooks observed that "Bush creates and maintains negative frameworks in his listeners’ minds with a number of linguistic techniques borrowed from hypnosis and advertising to instill the image of a dark and evil world around us." 

His subliminal messages to justify religious war against "evildoers" are right out of Madison Avenue. Writing in The New Yorker of July 12 & 19, David Greenberg tells how Bush speechwriter Michael Gerson, "himself an evangelical, laces the President’s addresses with seemingly innocuous terms that the devout recognize as laden with meaning: ‘whirlwind,’ ‘work of mercy,’ ‘safely home,’ ‘wonderworking power.’" 

Aspiring political hypnotists would do well to study Hitler as an introduction to Bush.

Link

via-Information Clearing House

Monday, July 19, 2004

How Fucked Up Is The World?


Because Alessandra is Brazillian, I have an interest in things Brazil. I caught this on NPR today and thought I would pass this along.
At least 25,000 people are working as slave labourers in Brazil, according to a new report obtained by the BBC.- via BBC News

So why isn't the US rushing to liberate them? Oh, no oil.


On Killing


I can't remember where I had hear about this book, On Killing : The Psychological Cost of Learning to Kill in War and Society by Lt. Col. Dave Grossman, but I had meant to read it, then promptly forgot about it. But the idea of the book, and what it represents had stuck in my head and had given me yet another reason to oppose our "Liberation" of Iraq, or "War on Terror" or "War Against Iraq" or "The US vs The World" or whatever it is called.

In the past couple of days 2 Articles have been posted on-line at Fark and American Samizdat (articles 1 & 2) about the topic of soldiers learning to kill and Post Traumatic Stress Disorder.

And then it seems that The Titan Corporation lost a 250 Million Dollar counseling contract via- The Army Times

SAN DIEGO — The government said Tuesday it will not renew a contract with Titan Corp. to provide up to $250 million worth of counseling services for soldiers and their families, citing concerns raised in an audit.

The San Diego-based security and defense information company was given the job of setting up a 24-hour counseling service to help solve a range of problems — from finding a mechanic to marital strife.


Thanks Gov...

But it also seems that Titan has also been implicated in Abu Ghraib scandal because they hired contractors to help with interrogations.

What the Fuck? How did I end up here? How many pies do they have their fingers in, AND what does this all mean for the small little meat person who needs help.


Secret Language III




The Salmon of Doubt
I am now officially training for our local MS150 Charity Bike Ride, as I felt that getting off my ass and performing some exercise would be good for the body which of late seems to be rebelling. Things are going well, and this weekend I rode 34.2 miles, without killing myself. Yes I admit it was an easier ride than the one the week before which totally wiped me out, I'm still very proud of myself. I'll be soliciting for donations soon, so watch this space.

Anyway, the ride took us through a subdivision with these street names: Salmon, Porpoise, Trout, Perch.

What's wrong with this picture?

Friday, July 16, 2004



I think the pelicans are smacking pave because they can't decide if they are Mary-Kate or Ashley.

Newbies and local friends
If you wanna comment (and I encourage you to do so) click the green comment line to leave a comment.

Blogger has eaten my last 2 posts


So here it is again:

More destruction yesterday. Another broken glass, No Touch Monkey and a plastic case for some meds I'm on to whip my sinus infection.

I've heard tell that at moments of human state change physical/psychic/spiritual that these changes manifest themselves in the physical world as a result of the mind/body dumping it's toxic waste.

Or I'm just really really clumsy because I spend more time listening to my inner voice than watching where I'm going.

Either one is equally valid.

I wonder what I'll wreck today.

Thursday, July 15, 2004

Lost m' template



I don't know how I managed it, but I was messing around with my template and erased everything after my CSS.

Unfortunately, my backup is at work, so I have to have a temp.

Jeez. When will the destruction end?

Oh Yeah....


Yesterday marked my 12th year of technical sobriety. I haven't been to AA in a few years, so most likely I don't constitute "sobriety", especially because I haven't turned my will over to a Higher Power® in a while, and I'm don't have Serenity Now!, but I think I'm doing fucking awesome!

Wednesday, July 14, 2004

It's a soul, man




Here is the soul I've talked about. That white strip cutting across the wood is my cut and paste job. It was my idea to go the negative space route, but the other artists ran with it. That is shards of broken mirror inside the plaster shell. One side of the shell fell four feet to the ground before the show last night and only chipped a little off the back, couldn't even notice it. Luckily the glass was already broken.

I really like the fetishistic quality of the wood, to me a home made device is much more authentic in getting in touch with the "divine" than any human mediated religion.

This is meant to be a work in progress, so it will continue to grow and bloat and fall apart (my strip is very fragile).


The continuing adventures of Cap'n Marrrrk, Disaster Boy

In the making of the strip I had to buy some rubber cement, which I left in my car sitting in my loose change receptacle for a day. When I pulled it out last night to dump it, I discovered I had rubber cemented all my change together to the bottom the receptacle. I had tightly sealed the container, but the heat in the car must have cause the lid to expand, spilling the mucilagistic goo into my coinage.

It is a weird sensation to actually throw away money (as opposed to pissing it away). You should try it sometime.

Sphincter Clown





I saw this the other day at Big Lots a close out store. It was another day I wish I had the camera with me, but alas no. It struck me as something awful and perverted, and somehow it was a new item. Not something kitchy from the 60s or 70's, but brand spankin' new! It was surprisingly expensive by closeout store standards... $11.95.

I couldn't help but notice how those buttons looked like assholes. Acutal size, for this thing was a good 14 inches tall weighing in at 8 lbs or so.

That day I bought a 4 dollar plumbing snake. WIth that snake Disaster Boy (my alter, alter ego) accidentally punched a hole in the U-bend of his bathroom sink and then went back the next day to take a picture after returning the obviously defective snake. Luckily for me no one snatched up this treasure.


The Secret Language



A few months ago I began work on a collaborative art project with a few mentors who I work with at VivaVox. Our idea was to come up with an artistic representation of the soul. We finished the project on Monday (pictures to follow), and while I had wanted to do some crazy things with computers and sound and invented languages, it turned out that I was just too lazy.

Luckily synchronicity works for fools on occasion and Sauceruney had dug up from his old files [June 9th] a cut up of Alister Crowley and Buckminster Fuller he had done a few years ago. I grabbed it and used it for my soul project (to be shown later).

However, just seeing a cut-up caused me to be infected by cut-up meme, and I began to see examples of it performed inadvertanly on the web thanks to RSS and XSL newsfeeds and other odd databasing apps, and I have begun collecting examples of these, and will post them as I find them sufficently weird.

This picture was grabbed from Amazon and was only altered to clean up the extra whitespace for sizing purposes. Look at the book list to go with the main title. It appears to me both random, and somehow connected by theme, a secret language that speaks the tongue of human nature.

Monday, July 12, 2004

chances


It's not like this is your only chance [for success, love, fill in the blank] in life. There are always second, third, fourth, fifth chances even. The thing is though, the first couple are easy, not a lot of challenges to get you to your first place.

But as you get older, those chances become harder and harder to get ahold of each time they occur. Apparently you have to start making them happen on your own, and that involves work, no matter how much you or I may hate that word, it takes fucking work.

And you mull it over, and you sweat it out and you go through the motions, doing the actions that are expected to move you forward...

Then you start getting opportunites, which are chances wearing a different set of clothes.

Before you know it, you are an "overnight success".

And this time...

you'd better take it.

Friday, July 09, 2004

Railroaded


BoingBoing mentioned an accident on the Big Thunder Mountain Railroad at Disneyland...

A couple of years ago Alessandra and I met with her Brasillian Family at Disneyworld. Her 15 year old brother Bruno and I rode in the last car on the Big Thunder Mountain. Bruno doesn't like rollercoasters because he doesn't like going fast and out of control due to a high speed accident the family was in a few years prior, but we coaxed on to this kiddie coaster.

As pulled out of the station , we realized the lap bar had not locked and we waved it up and down as we passed the controller saying "Hey umm, ", but we should have screamed "Stop!", but we didn't.

We had wedged ourselves into a pretzel arms and legs entwined and braced against the side knowing full well that if there were a serious bump we would fly and die. Bruno's face was a rictus of fear while I laughed wildly pretty sure there were no bumps, but freaking anyway.

As you can guess, I didn't die, but Bruno...he didn't die either, but he didn't get on a coaster the rest of the trip even though we tried to trick him on to the Aerosmith Coaster, he saw through it.

That's my Big Thunder Mountain Railroad Story. I'm guessing that perhaps Disney will retire it. Perhaps they should check out the one on the other coast.

Mind and Body


I've been quite sickly for the past 6 weeks, what with the throat thing (unresolved, tests upcoming), leaving caffine and going Ayurvedic and a subsequent sinus infection. I did stupidly volunteer to ride in the MS 150, I haven't been on my bike for 3 months.

Today I got back on Old Blue and went for a ride. My main goal was to make it up the big hill that marks the 1/2 way point to work without dying. I did this handily, so feeling moderately frisky I decided to ride the 6.3 mile trail around the nearby park.

As I rode I felt my legs burn, my throat marble up and burn, and by heart beating fast. I thought about the terms, my legs my throat my body (no commas) and remembered that mind and body are one. Mentation and Cognation are the direct results of physical properties and function. It's silly to remark that my body doesn't want to do this, or my body hurts. I hurt, I feel, to use "my x" is only to remember the sub unit, which I think we forget and act as if the foot has a mind of it's own.

I am a wholistic bio-unit, and man tomorrow am I gonna be hurting.

Thursday, July 08, 2004

Eris Runs Amok at the County Library

The sign above the table near the checkout desk reads:
July is National Boredom Month

Check out one of these Graphic Novels


Ok, so I'm guessing this is for the Kiddies who are out of school. I saw an unsupervised group hanging around the Children's Section. I approve, you dump your kid off at the library, the librarians become your county tax paid child care workers and maybe they'll pick up a book or two.

But, I see the titles that are there and my eyebrows are raised. Sure there are a few "Dark Knight" Batman Titles, a few Mangas (which I didn't open, but I suspect there are no tentacles involved), and then I spy as Hero pieces, upright on holding racks these:

Young Gods & Friends

A book from Neil Gaiman's Sandman series and Emily is Strange

I see some naked breasts in Sandman, but I don't check it out because you can't just pick Sandman up and get started anywhere, I suspect you need to start at the begininng. I also see some naked breasts in the Young Gods book and forgetting I have former neighbor Tom's 3 year run of Heavy Metal Magazine in a box in my living room, decide to check that one out.

When I get home and open it up to read during lunch the first page reads as thus:

A woman is sitting at a desk composing an invitation, "Dear Dickless and...Dickless and...Shitbag...Shithead. Ok, Dear Dickless and Shithead, you are invited to attend a....then the phone rings.

I wonder if anyone was actually paying attention to the content when they set up the display. I sure hope so. This is too great to be just a random boneheaded occurence. Some of these titles are mindcracking. Too bad I snagged what could have been some pre-teen first softcore and cleveage masterbatory material.

Oh well, they can always surf the porn at home when Mommys not watching...While they still can.


Living in Sanity I

On the radio today I heard an advertisment for Nicorette®. As a former smoker, I understand the importance of quitting. However the Female Voice Over said this: "One bite of Nicorette® instantly delivers the medicine to your body to relieve cravings."

Medicine? Defintion: An agent, such as a drug, used to treat disease or injury.

From their website:
When you use nicotine gum like Nicorette®, you bite it and "park" it between your cheek and gum. That way, the lining of your mouth can absorb the nicotine.

If you want to control the amount of nicotine you use — or if having something to chew will help you occupy the time you once spent smoking — you may prefer this method. For best results, use Nicorette on a regular schedule to help prevent cravings in advance.


Yes this must be true but it sounds Bizzaro weird.

Living in Sanity II
I saw this today when I was at Sams Club buying some genetically modified superfruit.

Kiss Autographed Paul Stanley Acoustic Guitar

I know Kiss will whore their names out for anything, but I can't imagine some kid wanting to learn guitar on such an obvious piece of crap.

On the flipside, I did see Bono's first guitar at the Rock n' Roll Hall of Fame and his guitar was a piece of shit too, but it was all he could afford.

Still, these things are just so weird to me, that it cracks my head wide open.

Tuesday, July 06, 2004

James "Scotty" Doohan Diagnosed with Alzheimers



Forget Ronald Regan, somebody IMPORTANT has it.

via-Movie Poop Shoot

Speaking of Blowjobs...


Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back is on Comedy Central at this moment. Being edited for nudity, content and language I have to ask "What is the point?" those are all the best parts. I'll watch it anyway because I could use the laugh.

And on that note we cue the music...

Minor Swath of Destruction


24 hours in my life: of getting 25+ irritating chigger bites, ruining a laundry machine full of clothes with a pen in a pocket, breaking the remote control to the bedroom fan and getting my hours at work cut to 20 (indefinately), I can say that at least no one has died, we didn't have to put down any cats and I still have health insurance, but Mannnnnnn even the bath and the shave didn't help.

blowjob

CRITICS BLAST LIBERAL MEDIA
FOR BUSH "CHIMP" REMARKS



www.bushisnotachimp.org
Check out the image at the bottom of the site. Priceless!

As a news organization, Monkeywire generally refrains from advocacy, but every once in a while we make an exception.

The following is in response to the news, released over the weekend, that President Bush is succeeding in watering down the Endangered Species Act. ( See: http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/articles/A26242-2004Jul3.html )

thanks for your attention and support,

Carrie and Joe
Co-editors, Monkeywire.org

-thanks Alessandra

I was gone all weekend. Look for some new stuff later today

Friday, July 02, 2004

phaneronoemikon

breaking down the wall between brilliant and insane and merging them together in a wholistic lovely goo.

make sure you read the poetry.

via sauceruney

Hot Geek Girl Chat



Tech Girls are great, Tech Girls are awesome. Tech Girls want to chat with you!

http://www.askthetechgirl.com/

Man I always have Javascript questions. I wonder if i can bill it to the client?

There's also one I can talk to when I need to "Install My Cabinets"

Check out the Roster-Rrrawrr Rrrawrrrr

via-mememachinego.com

Eliza Gauger

Beautiful Woman

Fantastic Illustrator

Pirate Queen

by way of Fetishize-me.com

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