No Touch Monkey!

Last night we had a video menage a troihat with our friends and ex-neighbors: Thom and Dr. Lily Munster (on the left) in S.F. and Dr. Woensdag in Boulder. I haven't ever really seen what the various p.c. brand computers have for their chats, but all 3 couples are Mac users and the ichat is pretty fucking swank.

I suggested a movie night so we can all hit play at the same time and make snarky comments over the network. I think it would be an awesome way to eat up the miles and spend time with distant loved ones (yeah, I said it.)

Labels: Too Much Information

Absurd–adjective
1. utterly or obviously senseless, illogical, or untrue; contrary to all reason or common sense; laughably foolish or false



World's Biggest Production Pick-up Truck

I saw one of these parked in a driveway the last 3 times I've been past this house in Suburbia. I think it qualifies. And it Canary Yellow.


Seen on a sign: Sunshine Acres Retirement Community with special village for the memory impaired

My first thought was, "I live on 'Ahhhhh where the fuck am I? Gypsies are trying to steal my shoes! Lane."

Labels: Things and Stuff

Not much since Wed. I've still been working at that place, I was swamped on Friday, but I pulled it out. Went cycling yesterday, then spent the remainder of the day practicing guitar while Ale shot a series of pregnant art photos of a friend.

Fox cancelled Drive after only 3 episodes which pisses me off because while stupid, it was entertaining.

Yadda, yadda. I'm drinking my coffee now and going cycling again this morning to return home and help out installing a new floor in our sunroom

Have a nice day everyone.

Labels: Nothing to see here folks-move along

Laura Bush wants you to know that when it comes to Iraq, no one is suffering more than the First Couple. No one.

Yeah...go tell this woman: From an Angry Soldier

via- AMERICAblog: A great nation deserves the truth

Labels: The Man, WTF

You've already heard about the invasion of Virginia Tech by a couple dozen 'volunteer ministers' from the Church of Scientology. Now comes the mudslinging.

Xenuphobes sick of seeing yellow-shirted Scientologists show up to disasters alongside cable news cameras have accused Virginia Tech of inviting L. Ron's minions. An alleged 'ministers consultant' named Irmin wrote an all-points bulletin e-mail sent to Scientology volunteers last week stating: 'Our [volunteer ministers are] ... working in the student trauma center at the request of the provost. The VM [volunteer minister] team is helping her establish order and have started to deliver assists to students.'

The e-mail, posted by an alert Radar reader in our Comments section, also claimed that the Salvation Army had urgently sought the help of L. Ron's kids: 'We have been asked by the Salvation Army staff ... to provide 24-hour help for the next two days in the form of grief counseling and trauma relief for the parents and families of the victims.'

Well, not quite. More

Via-Radar Online via Something Awful

Labels: Culture Wars

So I'm freelancing for this place, and everyone is pretty nice, I'm invited back this week and so things are going smooth.

No other shoe dropping or anything like that, just kind of a weird thing...

Today a new intern started, a high school senior who wants to learn about working at design firm and all, but today there is really nothing for her to do because the network is down, and everyone is too busy to deal with her. So they ask me if I can tell her about production and computery things.

Sure, it's really no problem. I'm more than happy to help out someone and point them in the right direction. She has a scholarship to Savannah College of Art and Design and knows InDesign, but there's much she doesn't know.

I just thought it oddly pleasing that they asked me to do it. I mean I'm the temp, it's not my place to babysit the n00b, but it's still no big deal for me to do so...it's almost like they are treating me like a regular, but I can't forget I'm the temp because if that happens, you can bet something is going to turn around and bite me on the ass.

Labels: work

via The Onion

by Kurt Vonnegut
Extract from chapter 33:-

'As I said in my speech': I told him, 'your new middle name would consist of a noun, the name of a flower or fruit or nut or vegetable or legume, or a bird or a reptile or a fish, or a mollusk, or a gem or a mineral or a chemical element -- connected by a hyphen to a number between one and twenty.' I asked him what his name was at the present time.

'Elmer Glenville Grasso,' he said.

'Well,' I said, 'you might become Elmer Uranium-3 Grasso, say. Everybody with Uranium as a part of their middle name would be your cousin.'

'That brings me back to my first question,' he said, 'What if I get some artificial relative I absolutely can't stand?'

* * *

'What is so novel about a person's having a relative he can't stand?' I asked him. 'Wouldn't you say that sort of thing has been going on now for perhaps a million years, Mr Grasso?'

via Exploding Aardvark

In other news...I went to a wedding last night where the Groom is an Entomologist at the Zoo, so they had chocolate covered insect treats on the tables (my idea). So I ate a couple. They were tasted just like dried Soba noodles dipped in chocolate. I'm glad they weren't gooey.

And I just got back from a Couple's Baby Shower. Holy Jeez! Only the Poker I played with the other husbands kept me from being totally emasculated.

Labels: Worth your time

So I got a call from my father in law yesterday asking me if I wanted to go to a book fair. I was thinking he was in town and we would go down together, so I said "yeah", and he asked to look for a couple of books for him while I was down there. D'oh!

When I woke up this morning, the news was doing a remote from the location telling me that people were already in line for the fair...it was 6:45am for a 4pm Early Bird Day.

Since I had committed to going down there, I arrived at 3 pm and there were probably 600+ people in front of me in line.

As soon as they opened the gates, the crowd stampeded in and people began sweeping huge swaths of books into shopping carts and standing around defending them while they used their hand held computers to estimate value.

It made me really uncomfortable and took a lot of the fun out of looking for books, when the people next to you are walking in front of you Hoovering up the books sight unseen. Nearly the entire Occult section was taken in one swoop by a group with 4 shopping carts within minutes.

I spent 2.5 hours wandering around looking around for Codex Seraphinianus, but there was none for me to find.

I was also hoping to find a rare Vonnegut, like the awesome copy of "Slaughter House Five", I have, but the only book I found was "Galápagos".

Anyway, I bought a bunch of stuff for fun, but generally had a shitty time because I was surrounded not by gentle, browsing bibliophiles, but asshole sharks.

Labels: Rant

The Church of Scientology has dispatched 'ministers' to provide 'grief counseling' for shell-shocked youth at Virginia Tech - but critics suspect the sect hopes to convert the vulnerable students.

"It's shameless, how they milk human tragedy to promote their organization," charges Rick Ross, whose CultNews.net has long tracked the group, which counts Tom Cruise, John Travolta and Kirstie Alley among its members. "These young people [at VT] are experiencing trauma. What they need are qualified mental health professionals."

HollywoodInterrupted.com's Mark Ebner brands the Scientologists as "vultures" who are "hindering legitimate, heroic rescue efforts with their spurious 'therapies,'" such as a "touch assist" - a light massage, which, Ebner says, is "supposed to distract them from their tragedy. It's a form of mini-hypnosis."

"They did this at Ground Zero [after 9/11]," says Ross. "They did this in New Orleans [after Hurricane Katrina]. They look for very high-profile disaster that can be milked for photo ops" to promote the Church.

Church official Sylvia Stannard tells us that about 20 "ministers" are in Blacksburg, Va. "We're doing a lot of emotional counseling, which is kind of our speciality," says Stannard. "We prohibit our people from proselytizing," but she adds, "they are going to tell them they are Scientologists" and "they will answer questions."

The church, which preaches against all psychiatric pharmaceuticals, has already seized upon early reports that Cho Seung-Hui, the gunman accused of Monday's bloodbath, may have been taking antidepressents.

Stannard says the killings demonstrate "these mind-altering drugs" make "you numb to other people's suffering. You really have to be drugged up to coldly kill people like that."

Even before Cho's name was released, the Citizens Commission on Human Rights, a group founded by the church, said in a press release that "media and law enforcement must move quickly to investigate the Virginia shooter's psychiatric drug history - a common factor amongst school shooters."

Ebner argues that the commission "claimed psychiatric drugs caused the Columbine High School shooting. But it came out later that the shooters went wild because they were off their meds.

via-NY Daily News:

Labels: WTF

April 17th is Free Cone Day at: Ben & Jerry’s Homemade Ice Cream

Wheeeeeeee!

Don Ho dead at age 76.

Actually I don't care about Don Ho. Kurt Vonnegut was a definitely a one of a kind cranky-compassionate genius.

I went on a Vonnegut binge after college and thought about how sad all his characters were, and I didn't realize until much later, how hope he was about the individual human condition in the face of a suicidal species.

So in tribute. Here is Don Ho covering Peter Gabriel's "Shock the Monkey"

Labels: Trainwreck

On our way out to see "Chicago-The Musical" at the Fox Theater tonight, our local community radio station was doing a show on American Masters. Tonights episode was Tom Lehrer. I'd never heard of him, and I'm too damn lazy to post a link to anything other than an amusing Flash movie set to one of his songs Poisoning Pigeons in the Park, but for me, this definitely deserves a follow up.

Labels: Ahahahahaha, Worth your time

It seems like Spring came and went, now it's already Winter. Christ! No wonder the bees are dying off, it's supposed to snow tomorrow.

There seems to be a lot going on, even though nothing is really happening. I've had some very inconvenient health issues that I still can't really talk about yet. Nothing life threatening, but just...well, inconvenient. They are being addressed through medications, but I sure wish it would warm up so I can get some exercise.

NTM, is running slowly because I've been looking for jobs and working some freelance. It appears to be going well, and the people seem to like me. I put in a 4o hr week, I've been invited back for next week. It's pretty much been expressed that now they are seriously checking me out to see how I fit in, and whether I can do the job. It should be educational for all of us because it's not run like a normal shop where everyone has a box. Here the boundaries are very fuzzy and you are expected to take responsibility for your own work. I'm not quite sure how that works, but I'm interested in learning.

So far none of the stuff I've sent out has really come back yet except for some basic Photoshop stuff I did, that turned out well, and I was praised several times on a personal level by an owner.

It would be weird working in a design place where I actually get respect. It actually makes me want to earn it.

Uhhh, not much else. We have a home improvement project coming up that should be relatively easy, and I need to mow the fucking yard that I'm highly allergic to.

As my friend Rock n Roll Larry says, "Blah, Blah, Woof Woof!"

If I find something cool, of course I'll post it here.

Labels: Things and Stuff

The first piece discovered. On the left is Dave Kelly's (Shmorky's) Purple Pussy comic from September 19, 2001. On the right is Todd Goldman's "original" artwork, as seen in a Los Angeles art gallery.



Todd charges upwards of 4 Grand for his "inspired" artwork. People pay it, AND he has Target sells his goods under another name.

It would appear that Todd Goldman has made a very lucrative career of stealing other peoples ideas.

Look at all the shit he has ripped off

Labels: The Man

A great weekend full of hanging out practicing guitar, watching tv (30 Rock catch-up), reading and playing games with friends.

I am working this week at the same place I worked last week. Most of what I did today was color correction on a bunch of photos of scientists and engineers for the client. One guy I worked on was the spitting image of Professor Hubert Farnsworth from Futurama.



I had to remove a ton of face dandruff as well as a weird facial rash and red blemishes.

No hot bikini chicks on the list unfortunately.

Labels: work

12.3 million+ views. Holy Crap.

I thought it was funny and that Alessandra would think it was dumb, but I was surprised when she laughed her ass off and told me to post it. So here it is.

Heyyyy Charrlieeeee...

Just a very brief but heartfelt thanks to Canon U.S.A who fixed the LCD on her PowerShot SD550 after she dropped it for free out of warrenty. She was looking at either a $170ish bucks to swap it out for a refurbished one, or a minimum $119 repair fee. She got it back 5 days after sending it in for an estimate.

Thanks Canon!

First it was taking Lola for a walk in a shoulder sling. Then it was dressing them up in sweaters. Then beginning to cover the couch in plastic when we weren't home, or when Tala was out of her room and no one is around to supervise her couch visits.






Now it is the Neon Green Cat Buggy (also for Lola), so we can take her on extended walks without fear of escape. She really appears to enjoy it and has taken to jumping in and crouching down in expectation of a ride.

I would say that Alessandra is totally sublimating the child rearing urge, which is fine by me. I'd rather her dress up the cats, and take Lola for a walk then spending hundreds of thousands of dollars on child for 18+ years just so I can feel "rewarded". No way!

Let the Good Times Stroll!

Labels: Too Much Information

From the archives:



My mom had several encounters with this famous person and this is the only photo that survives. It sits in a frame on a table as opposed to being buried in a box, so it has a place of honor. I think the photo is hilarious because so much of the person's head is cut off.

Do you know who it is? Hint 1: He likes nachos and football. Hint 2: His wife looks trashed.

Labels: Only Human

I got called back to the place I worked at the other day. The Agent from the Agency said that my client told him very nice things about me. This morning an owner told me that my coworkers asked her to call me back in today, so she did.

They are sizing me up it seems, and so far (if the stuff I sent out today doesn't have any problems), it appears good. I've finished up the work for the week surprising them with my speed. This is surprises me, because I'm working much slower than I usually do, triple checking stuff for errors. Like I said, I hope the pieces I sent out don't have any problems at the printer, if so, I won't hear about it until Monday.

The place seems like a good place to work and I hope it would be a good match.

Whoosh! I make the jump, and it's a good day: I am focused, ready and busy deftly resizing ads, color correcting images, recreating copy blocks and solving problems presented. I am thanked and complimented on my eye and my speed, by the folks who seem pretty nice. I eat lunch with several of them, and am please they are not standoffish towards the Temp.

I am one of two up for the job, and tomorrow my competitor gets his day, he has a financial advance over me in that he their freelance guy, and I'm the placement agency guy, so if they go with me, it will cost them more. Had they only answered my email a week sooner they would have known me before calling the agency, but as it is, since the agency got my foot in the door they get the find.

I heard that the guy who replaced me at my last job, came from the place I want to go. He is unhappy in my old position, and wants to come back but they won't take him because he doesn't have the skills. At first I was pleased with Schafenfreude, but then I realized that most of the people in the creative end of the Biz are quite nice, and while it paid ok, I wouldn't wish my old job on anyone. They claim, "There's no 'jerk' in team." and neglect the fact that the technically the owner is not ON the team that he owns by definition. But that's just being bitter. Can I fault the Sucker who replaced me at the Sucker job? No.

And while I was busy, it was a "day flying by" kind of busy. I've been bored silly for the last 6 months if not longer, so I could really use some more of those days, especially if they pay well.

Labels: personal, Stuff, work

I have a job audition today. Having passed the interview, but not quite sticking the landing, I am granted one day on the job to see how I work and if I fit. This is a temp->long term->permanent gig if I pass. While I am vehemently opposed to the concept of work, this past month has kind of sucked not bringing in my half of the rent while running up the credit card. Sooooo, cross your flippers.

Labels: meatspace, work